Twenty Six

Around 26, it's a scary age really. You aren't young enough to still figure out what you want but aren't old enough to have figured it all out yet. You've seen it all, been there, done that and yet there is so much more left to do. It's surprising to be honest. When I was 18, I had no particular vision for myself. I lived life one moment at a time. There was so much contentment back then. But today I feel like there's so much in life that I have left to do. It's like your desires multiply as you grow, as if you realise what all you are capable of and see yourself accomplishing it as well.

Today theres not much that I want, except that I want it all. I want to roam around Sweden with my fiance and click pretty pictures, I want myself in one of those dreamy wedding videos, I want to call someone from the metro and ask them if they have reached to pick me, I want to take flights and attend an official party with someone, I want to call someone twice everyday just to ask what they had for food, I want to see sitcoms with someone and share Netflix accounts, I want to walk down the grocery store with them and pick up bread, milk and vegetables for the week, I want to wear matching colours and click a thousand pictures.

But you know, I also want to achieve my dreams before I get there. I want to be an independent, self-sufficient, professionally content and intellectually satisfied entity before I get there.
It's like I want to have it all one day, but have it all now.

It's an age of perpetual inner turmoil, this 26.